So I’m coding. Fast. Like a superhero. So fast the keyboard catches fire.

And the keyboard is now on fire.

And the fire alarm goes off and the sprinklers are sprinklin’.

And I start thinking…
sorry, thinkin’…

Have you ever been using a website or a road or a building or a piece of software, and then suddenly they have a redesign — an upgrade to a new version — and it’s all nice and sleek and objectively better, but you feel lost and disoriented and naked and scared and alone and you want everything back the way it was? And you fire up your email client and you write to the mayor, you write to tech support, and no matter what it is you literally write, what you’re emotionally saying is:

“How do I get back there to,
The place where I fell asleep inside you?
How do I get myself back to,
The place where everything made sense?
I want something else. I want the semi-charmed thing I had before”

Long ago, before Kenyans ruled America, there was a piece of software called Khatzumemo. But kids today call it Surusu.
I learned a lot of things during the development of Khatzumemo. One of which is that a sudden good thing is just as much a shock to the system as a sudden bad thing. Nowadays, the hyperobservant among you will notice that Surusu is always changing, but the changes are always small and barely perceptible. So small that you don’t realize that the Surusu you have now looks, acts and feels nothing like the Surusu of 6, 12 or 24 months ago.

Khatz, Darling, Sweetie…What does all this “thinkin’” have to do with Neutrino?

Well, my original intention had been to have Neutrino replace SilverSpoon in one violent, fell swoop, like a medieval succession. Kill SilverSpoon’s whole family, her friends, and replace all the furniture in her house. Then, during the summer, burn down her house (awww…poor furniture) and build a new one right on top of it. Classic change of administration.

Yet, as the sprinklers rained down on me and wet my white T-shirt so it kind of clung to my manly body ever-so-seductively, it came to pass that I was no longer so sure that that’s the best course of action. Violent disruption is violent disruption, and it doesn’t matter whether that’s good or bad. It doesn’t matter that that guy’s body could benefit from a new organ, it’s still going to (try to) reject the new one it gets given.

So Neutrino is born. And SilverSpoon isn’t dead. But SilverSpoon isn’t staying the same either. Rather, the two are merging into one. From now on it’s SilverSpoon 7.0: Neutrino. Many things seem the same (for now), but everything’s already different. She, SilverSpoon, to all appearances, has the same face and voice. But her DNA has already started changing and is changing as we speak. She’s evolving. She’s growing different organs. Her cells are producing different proteins…and stuff.

Instead of having two separate organisms, they’re being merged into one.

But the change isn’t going to hurt. It’s not going to be like when Wolverine got adamantium bones (be honest: I’m losing you, aren’t I?). In fact, you’re not going to realize that everything has changed completely until everything’s already changed completely. And I think that’s how things should be. It’s a gentler, funner, cooler, more natural way of doing things. No French Revolution here. No violent, nostalgia-inducing switch. No “awww, dude, Communism was so awesome…I wish we could go back”. No. More an inexorable progression. No confusion, no disorientation, no looking back.

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again…

You deserve the best. At the very least, you deserve better than the crap that exists out there right now. I want you to have the best. And I want to be the guy who replaced the idea you got from me with an even better idea. I want you to succeed at getting used to languages. It’s a small thing to want, but it is what it is.

Nevertheless, it’s not enough to merely be given the best. It has to be given in the best way. And the best way isn’t a kick in the nuts. No, one must cup, stro…wait, wait, no…that was meant for my masseuse.

ANYWAY!

What is SilverSpoon-Neutrino?

• Where old SilverSpoon measured time, SilverSpoon-Neutrino measures choices.
• Where old SilverSpoon is about direction, SilverSpoon-Neutrino is about addiction.
• Where old SilverSpoon is about when and how, SilverSpoon-Neutrino is about here and now.
• Where old SilverSpoon is about effects, SilverSpoon-Neutrino is about causes.
• Where old SilverSpoon is about days, SilverSpoon-Neutrino is about atoms.
• Where old SilverSpoon talks, SilverSpoon-Neutrino whispers subliminal messages into your soul.

Old SilverSpoon helped you find the crack, SilverSpoon-Neutrino is the crack.

You will never have to think again. You will never have to fret again. You will never have to plan again. You will never have to worry again.
At least as far as this language learn game is concerned.
All you need do is show up for your fix. And not even that: the addiction will make you show up.
That’s because SilverSpoon-Neutrino requires even less of you than old SilverSpoon (as if such a thing were possible — yeah…pulled it off …you can thank me later )

SilverSpoon-Neutrino allows you to be even dumber (because being too smart and being too dumb are basically the same thing, amiright?) and lazier and scareder and busier than the kids of old SilverSpoon.
SilverSpoon-Neutrino is deliberately, dastardlily ¹ designed to be addictive. Joyfully, vegasesquely, relentlessly, life-ruiningly addictive.

I believe in addiction. Not just in its power — which is obvious — but also in its neutrality.
I believe in easy. Because I’m lazy.
And, as always, I believe in hookers and blow. Gotta believe in the hookers and blow.

Nothing is wrong with things that are addictive. Something is right with them.
The addictive part is right. Everything else about them may be wrong, but the addictive part is just fine.

SilverSpoon-Neutrino harnesses the power of addiction and uses it for good, where good = “get used to Japanese” or “get used to Chinese” or “whatever, man, as long as it helps with Khatz’s hookers and blow”.

What Are The Key Changes in SilverSpoon-Neutrino?

There are far too many changes to list here or anywhere — this is something that needs to be experienced to be understood. But here is a brief description of some of the changes:

• More customization, hyper-personalization
  • Old SilverSpoon was temporally customized — you got exactly what matched the day you were on. The scale of things was hidden from you This was an amazing step forward at the time, using temporal “blinders” to hide information from you to keep you calm and focused — but had two weaknesses. One was that time kept moving. The other was that even a day can be too much to think about.
  • Days were one of the basic units of Old SilverSpoon. There are no “days” in SilverSpoon-Neutrino. It’s all about “atoms”. Tiny, atomic actions and semi-actions and choices. Everything happens at a granular, ultra-personal, atomic level (in fact, the project codename for SilverSpoon-Neutrino was “AtomSpoon”). Time does not exist. Now is all there is. You are the star.
  • So, for example, you can skip over anything and everything you can’t or don’t want to do at any time, but not have to think about it. In this respect, SilverSpoon-Neutrino is your mother, your nanny, and your secretary. She will bring it up for you later.
  • You can do only what you can and want to do at the time, but never get lost and never have to think or plan or consider or strategize or worry about how to backtrack so you’re on track. Deviation is built in, expected and celebrated.
  • You can never fall behind because there literally is no behind: there is only you and there is only now. It’s all about freeing you from all thinking about learning, so you can think about other things while learning takes care of itself. It’s everything that school is (structured), and everything that school isn’t (awesome, personalized precisely, exactly to and for you, your preferences, your situation)
• New: The Addiction Engine
  • At the core of the software behind SilverSpoon-Neutrino sits a set of structures, algorithms and processes that I call the Addiction Engine.
  • SilverSpoon-Neutrino integrates the best old ² and new research on the nature of addictive, compulsive and avoidance behavior, wraps that research into a little ball, slaps you with it and leaves you literally begging for more. What makes gambling addictive? What makes fun fun? Why do we choose to do one thing and not another? SilverSpoon-Neutrino knows why. And it’s going to use that knowledge on you to devastating effect.
• Gamification
  • While SilverSpoon-Neutrino itself is emphatically not a game — it’s something far more vast, powerful, intentional and sinister than that , it contains certain elements of games to add to the fun and…games. Experience points, friendly competition, school shootings ³, it’s all there. No Italian plumbers, though. Awww…

Fair Enough, But Version 7.0? Dude, WTF? Are You ON Crack? What Happened to 2~6?

This is too big a deal to be limited by sequence. We’re growing into a new life form here, not just getting bigger or faster. We’re not even governed entirely by the same physics. Yes…this is the sound of me going to the playground of ideas, picking Science up in my unmarked van and…touching it…

OK, Great, Cute, Very Clever, How Do I Get Mine?

Join SilverSpoon (if you manage to get a spot). SilverSpoon and Neutrino are merging, so SilverSpoon is Neutrino and Neutrino is SilverSpoon, the next evolution. That’s why it’s called SilverSpoon-Neutrino. Like magic, brah.

What’s The Benefit of Joining Sooner Rather Than Later?

For one thing, it’ll be cheaper. It always is in AJATT land: it’s always a better deal to join earlier. SilverSpoon-Neutrino comes with an upgrade fee for all newbies. But…this upgrade fee will be waived for the first 10 people to join. You’ll need to be on top of your game and stay alert for announcements, because there are hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of people on the waiting list, enough to fill a decent-sized school.

So What About BigBoi and Vanilla and SinoSpoon And All That Good Stuff?

That still applies. You join the SilverSpoon you’re qualified for (or try to, rounds and spaces permitting). You’ll be taken up a traditional SilverSpoon “time ladder”, while gradually getting introduced and shifted into the Neutrino way of doing things. The entry gate is the same and the earliest stages of the path are the almost the same.

What Languages?

Same as SilverSpoon 1.0: only Japanese and Mandarin for now. People getting used to these languages need the most help anyhow. You’ll know if and when that changes .

What About The Guarantees?

For your convenience, the same guarantees and time frames apply as for SilverSpoon 1.0. Although time doesn’t exist in SilverSpoon-Neutrino; we’ll let it exist on the outside .

Anything Else?

Nothing that I can think of?

You want to win. I want you to win. And I have something the likes of which (to my knowledge) has never been made before, something that’s going to make you win despite yourself. Come. Let us win together.

What Now? What’s The Next Step I Should Take?

Get on the waiting list!

Then…learn more about the SilverSpoon program (if you haven’t already) and stay alert and hope you get a chance to get in.

What If I’m Already In SS?

You’re in like Flynn. You’re already one of the Chosen Ones. You’ll be taken care of .

What’s This I Hear About You And Playgrounds And An Unmarked Van?

Yeah, no…ignore that…